The Daily Dumb 2-2-2011

By cpu at February 2nd 2011, 4:24 AM -

Gymnastics fail.


David Thorne is back, and he's pissed at a sporting goods store.


That wheelchair is definitely 4 wheel drive.


2 fails for the price of 1.


See, look at the upside of littering.


12 guage punch to the face.


serious nerd rage.


Michael Bay has never seen this diagram.


Soccer master.


More gymnastics fail.


Children everywhere are beginning to run and hide again.


Ball didn't stand a chance in hell.


Great sports talk ever.


This guy will be blowing up Mars from his back yard in no time.


Sparky wants to be a drummer.


Castlevania kink.


Linda Blair's cat has been found.


Cheating at dice.


Beer pong slam dunking.


Drifting cats.


...and yet I still manage to break the sons of bitches....


Massive slip and slide.


Rites of passage: Some suck more than others.


Seems like appropriate retaliation.


Do the creep.


Smuggling fail.


Adrenaline junkies.


This is nuts.


Geriatric ownage.


Viva la revolucion!


Didn't quite clear it did he?


I think there's an age when a guy can't scream for his mommy anymore without being considered a total wuss.


Nice job Microsoft.


Contrast.


Oh nerd humor.


Facebreaker.


Frozen wheels.


Drinking and getting stoned at the same time.


5 insane early drafts of famous movie characters.


Congress forgets how to pass a law.

It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood. When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope. At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars. The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door (which she closed behind him), and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced. When he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast: eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh-squeezed orange juice. When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee. As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge.

"All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the dollar for?" "Well," she said, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you." He said, "Fuck him, give him a dollar." The lady then said, "The breakfast was my idea."