The Daily Dumb 5-2-2011

By cpu at May 2nd 2011, 5:01 AM -

ixnay on the inladenba.


There won't be any alien mind control going on in there.


NOthing wrong with old fashioned scare tactics.


Nice throw.


What happens in Vegas.... still hurts after you leave.


How much booze does something like this require?


New spin on an old prank.


Brutal vocal warmup.


Dog shoes.


Crazy ping pong shot.


Hear a grown ass man scream like a little girl.


Childhood memories.


5 iconic corporate mascots invented by mistake.


I have a new hero.


The president speaks out.


UFC 129 Couture vs Machida.


UFC 129 Also vs Hominick


UFC 129 MacDonald vs Diaz.


UFC 129 Jabouin vs Garza.


Headshot.


Funny insect parody.


Takes a big ole pussy to scare off a crocodile.


Greatest hotel guest.


Obama rips on Trump.


Nutty explosion.


Not hiking that path without a parachute.


Lots of fails this April.


How to shit your pants on the highway.


Nursery rhymes...


This looks like a hell of a lot of fun.


Great reversal.


Cop punches a chick.... and it's funny.


He's mad.... at a parking lot.... and everything in it.


Like a fuckin' boss.


7 simple questions you won't believe science just answered.

Two guys were picked up by the cops for smoking dope and appeared in court before the judge. The judge said, "You seem like nice young men, and I'd like to give you a second chance rather than jail time. I want you to go out this weekend and try to show others the evils of drug use and get them to give up drugs forever. I'll see you back in court Monday."

Monday, the two guys were in court, and the judge said to the first one, "How did you do over the weekend?"

"Well, your honor, I persuaded 17 people to give up drugs forever," he said.

"Seventeen people? That's wonderful. What did you tell them?" the judge said.

"I used a diagram, your honor. I drew two circles. The first very large, then the second very small."

and told them this (the big circle) is your brain before drugs and this small circle) is your brain after drugs."

"That's admirable," said the judge. "And you, how did you do?" he asked the second guy.

"Well, your honor, I persuaded one hundred fifty six people to give up drugs forever," he said.

"That many people! How amazing! How did you manage to do that!" the judge asked.

"Well, I used the same two circles. I pointed to the small circle and told them, 'this is your anus before prison,'" he said.